As heard on the Good Stuff with Jim Thompson

 Most folks don’t know that ‘ol Santa and me
have been friends for a real long time
So whenever he needs some advice or help
he goes to a phone and he drops in his dime

So I wasn’t surprised when he called that day
Tho’ the request seemed a little bit strange
Seemed his riendeer was all gettin’ too old
And ‘ol Rudolph had come down with the mange

So he was needin’ to get some fresh stock, fast
to pull his sleigh on his once a year trip
He’d had a few prospects lined up some time back
But it seemed they’d all given him the slip

So he wanted to know if I could find him anything
See’in as I had done some tradin’  in the past
He claimed they didn’t need to be broke all that good
But they dang sure needed to be awful fast

See’in as  how ‘ol Santy was in such a bad bind
I just knew they pay would be dang good
So I just kind’a started puttin’ out some feelers
To all the traders in my surrounding neighborhood

I wasn’t real specific about just what I needed
Claimed I was lookin’ for some light pullin’ stock
But I kept all the particular’s kind’a vague
Like when your sellin’ somethin’ at the auction block

Pretty soon I had every kind of a draft horse
Plus some hot bloods from right off ‘a the track
And some prospective dog teams of Greyhounds too
So I got on the phone and called ‘ol Santy right back

I told him I had just what he’s lookin for
See, I was needin’ to get this deal done right away
Told him to get his checkbook and head on down
See, I had a few outstanding debts I was needin’ to pay

But Santa’s a good buddy and a trusting feller
Told me just to send ‘em all and he’d pay the freight
He’d pick out the best and then he’d cull all the rest
Price didn’t matter, as long as they didn’t arrive late

So I shipped ‘em all north, each and every one
When his check didn’t bounce, it sure made my day
But yuh know, it does seem kind’a peculiar to me
That I ain’t heard from ‘ol Santy, to this very day

Robert Dennis   12/01