Birth Order

Your clothes:
1^st Baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy
2^nd Baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3^rd Baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

 
Preparing for the Birth:
1^st Baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2^nd Baby: You don’t bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn’t do a thing.
3^rd Baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

 
The Layette:
1^st Baby: You pre-wash newborn’s clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby’s little bureau.
2^nd Baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3^rd Baby: Boys can wear pink, can’t they?

 
Worries:
1^st Baby: At the first sign of distress—a whimper, a frown—you pick up the baby.
2^nd Baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3^rd Baby: You teach your three year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

 
Pacifier:
1^st Baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2^nd Baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3^rd Baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
 

Diapering:
1^st Baby: You change your baby’s diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2^nd Baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3^rd Baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

 
Activities:
1^st Baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
2^nd Baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3^rd Baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner. 

Going Out:
1^st Baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2^nd Baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3^rd Baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

 
At Home:
1^st Baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2^nd Baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn’t squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3^rd Baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

Swallowing Coins (a favorite)
1^st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand and x-ray.
2^nd child: When second child swallow a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
3^rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance.